cfiadw [prologue]

"catching fire in a devil's whisper" revision commentary
prologue

before we start i'd like to welcome you to my brand new dreamwidth!! while i get used to how it works and the fact that i have a form of typing more than 240 characters at once at my disposal, i'll be focusing, for now, on these revision commentaries as i work my way through my fics!  i hope you're even just a smidge as excited as i am!

the plan is, for your sakes and my own, to only include passages from the fic in question that i edited or have something to say about; some of these monster chapters are like 9k apiece and i don't plan on making you guys sort through my own commentary and then a million more words you've probably read before heh.  but if in future commentaries you guys want me to put in the entire chapter please let me know, especially if maybe you've yet to read the fic and just wanna check out my commentaries and want context!  i'm still deciding how i want to format this as a whole but! bolded portions will denote an edit/change that's been made!!

tw: as always, this fic deals in depth with themes of abuse (emotional/psychological, minor physical, implied sexual), manipulation, gaslighting, etc., and the resulting trauma.  as such, i'll be discussing such themes in my commentary, especially as the fic reaches its climax.  so if that in any way is triggering for you, i would highly suggest not reading.  or, at the very least, please be careful.

let's go let's goooo!

currently playing: "reminiscence" by olafur arnalds & alice sara ott
fic word count: 110,021
 

 

I'm editing this fic the way I began writing it; sitting alone in the dark, keyboard lit only by the brightness of my screen and the flickering of the candles on the windowsill (spiced apple scents, because it might be 90 degrees still but fall is here!).  My classical music playlist is on, partly so I can focus without words in my head - partly to settle into the vibe and ~aesthetic~ "catching fire in a devil's whisper" has.  Before I even start reading, I remember how utterly thrilled I was to begin writing this story.  Technically the third Seventeen fic I ever started, it came, as many of you know, after SVT's appearance at the 2020 Golden Disk Awards.  At one point each of them wore a gorgeous masquerade mask and fancy suits, and my sister immediately decided someone (me) needed to write a Phantom of the Opera AU.

I, a fan of the musical ever since I saw the movie years and years ago (and then the musical itself in Las Vegas lmao), of course jumped at the chance and we threw the movie on to plan.

From the start, we knew we wanted to "update" it, so to speak, for a more modern way of thinking.  Casting choices were decided before the overture was finished; deciding the Big Three was the easiest.  Mingyu as Phantom might seem Really Weird and Perhaps A Bit Shocking but my reasoning for "casting" for AUs is simply that: it's a role they're playing in this story.  Like a movie.  My sister and I cast Mingyu as Phantom as an homage to the ehhh decent portrayal of Phantom that we grew up with; Mingyu is tall and devastatingly handsome the way Gerard Butler was in 2004 and, as an actor, could do it well, we like to think (ofc you all know i am DYING to see seokmin play the role on stage hhhhh).  Plus, the Gyuhan dynamic is just.......... Really Really Good.  So then with Mingyu as Phantom and Jeonghan as Christine it was Obvious to us that Seungcheol would be Raoul and from there, the rest of it fell into place.  Chan as Meg; Wonwoo as half Madame Giry, half oc; Seungkwan as the incomparable Carlotta (who deserves So Much better), Seokmin and Soonyoung as Firmin and Andre was, I think, the pinnacle of our cast (what I would Pay to see BooSeokSoon perform "Prima Donna"...).... I mean, I adore this musical and each of its characters so to imagine my favorite people as them.... 

Ever since then, "catching fire in a devil's whisper" has been my most favorite fic of mine.  My favorite to write, to plan, to edit, to think about....

[The title is an adaption of lyrics from a song by Mino (i honestly forget which one!).]

[Jeonghan is alone when he wakes up.]

One reason I love this fic so much is because of how anxious and scared Jeonghan is in it, which sounds AWFUL but let me explain; as someone who struggles with anxiety I found it so easy to write in his panic attacks, his moments of dread, and they honestly helped me, in some way, come to terms with my own.  Always trying to better my writing, when I noticed I was feeling panicky I'd stop and think "hey, how am I feeling right now?  How would I describe this?" and the panic would lessen.

[And besides, the sensations cease as soon as Jeonghan sits up and listens for the soft sounds of a fountain pen scratching on paper down the hall and then a smile will touch his face.  Every time.  And this morning is no exception.  He sits against the headboard, blankets pooling around his thighs, and just listens.  He can picture Seungcheol at his desk, the window in front of it wide open to let in as much light as possible.  Curly hair falling into his eyes the way it did when he was twenty years old - and he'll stop writing every few minutes to brush it back with a light huff.  A glass of water beside him, increasingly untouched the more he writes, the deeper into his work he gets.  From here, the sound of his pen is gentle, comforting - everything about Seungcheol is comforting, Jeonghan has come to learn - and it helps the panic.  He focuses on it until his breathing returns to normal, until his heart stops echoing through his body.  He focuses on it until he feels ready to begin his day.]

At the risk of sounding vain, this has to be one of my favorite iterations of fic Jeongcheol ever.  They go through so much - best childhood friends who are then separated by forces beyond them; to be reunited a decade later, at the tender age of twenty, and realize they're falling in love only to have that be threatened, once again, by something that wants to tear them apart so badly.  They are full of love and grief and nostalgia for each other, for friends, for family, even, to some degree, for enemies - and just thinking about them spending the rest of their lives together.... hey okay, I really love this jc so much.

[Jeonghan sighs once more and heads down the hall to his husband’s study without so much as fixing his hair or changing out of his bedclothes.  There would be no point in doing so, he decided long ago; Seungcheol has seen him at his lowest point and still adores him.  Where he might have doubted such love years before, Jeonghan is older now, wiser now; too much has happened to prove to him that he can trust Seungcheol with the deepest, even worst, parts of himself.  And he takes these little moments of trust where he can, moments he once thought he would never have with anyone.  He enters the study, looking the epitome of sleep, and greets Seungcheol with a kiss to his scarred cheek, rubs his knotted shoulders until he sets down his pen.]

At this point in his life, twenty years since everything happened, Jeonghan is still dealing with the trauma forced upon him.  It was something I always wanted to see the musical/movie touch on, but all we ever get to see of any aftermath is Raoul at the opera house auction forty or fifty years later, Christine simply a beloved memory... but it's obvious in his first words, spoken to the papier mache monkey thing the Phantom had {"a collector's piece indeed / every detail exactly as she said... / will you still play when all the rest of us are dead?"} that what happened in that single year (or less, depending on which timeline you subscribe to) had such a profound effect on him... I always wondered how Christine dealt with it as she grew older.  Of course, my fic is darker and the character of the Phantom is less redeemable (which shouldn't be possible but hey, Phantom was written and composed in the '80s lmao...), which means more trauma...

[Every day of his life, Jeonghan is in awe of Seungcheol and his handsomeness.  How he still looks so young after all these years, even with age clinging to his face and hair and body the way it is.  Wrinkles gracing the edges of his eyelids, gray hairs peppered amongst the blackest black, fatigue where there didn't used to be...  That youthful spark he carried in his eyes decades ago remains, and it renders Jeonghan speechless for a moment, stroking his cheek as he simply looks at him.  Not for the first time in his life - and he knows it won't be the last - the thought crosses Jeonghan's mind that he is lucky to have Seungcheol at his side.]

Throughout the fic, we are reminded of how much, how deeply, how foolishly at times, Seungcheol loves Jeonghan.  Ignoring very real threats from a very real man, surviving several attacks with physical and emotional scars, and ultimately scheming for said very real man's downfall to save his love - down to the moment he begs Jeonghan to let him die if it means Jeonghan will be free. Seungcheol is the epitome of unconditional, young, and heroic love in this role, so much so that I feel sometimes Jeonghan's equally as sweet, as pure love gets a bit lost in the mix.  However, we see it clearly here in this soft morning and that's why this prologue is so important to me.  Jeonghan loves Seungcheol just as much as Seungcheol loves him.  He always has.

[“Love,” he whispers, reaching for Jeonghan with hands that do not tremble, that have never trembled.  No, they’ve always held Jeonghan so close, so steady.  Even in his darkest moments.  So he trusts them now, just like he did back then, and entwines his fingers with his husband’s.  “They’re tearing down the opera house this week.”]

The amount of love and trust between these two... hhhh they're so romantic.

[So with a heavy breath and words that sound more courageous than he feels, he murmurs, “You’re right.  I’m - I’m tired of it all.  I just… I hope it works.  I want to feel like myself again.”]

I could spend thousands of words discussing the way Jeonghan's trauma has changed who he is as a person in this fic.  But it would break my heart to do so.

["I'm ready," he whispers."]

yes you Are!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and so are we....

 

 

 

I always find controversial writer things amusing, but the never-ending feud of "prologue vs no prologue" gets me Going.  Some argue that they're unnecessary and convoluted - but I've never thought so, and I don't think so with this fic.  Telling this story as a story - that is to say, as Jeonghan's thoughts, as Seungcheol's thoughts, as Wonwoo's and even Junhui's, as they remember what happened during that year - always felt so natural to me.  It's also an homage to the novel, published in 1909, which was written as an investigative report "told" presently to the reader.  Because of all of this, I'll love this prologue forever, I think.

I don't have many thoughts as I reach the end of it, but the few I do have mirror Jeonghan's words: I'm ready.  Chapter one, shall we?

 

cfiadw [ch. 1] [1/2]

"catching fire in a devil's whisper" revision commentary
chapter one, part one

currently listening to: "the 7th sense" by nct u

fic word count: 110,103

For this fic, I have three playlists I switch between: the main kpop playlist, the emo rock music playlist, and the dark classical playlist.  I always make at least one playlist for my major fics and I am endlessly proud of the main one for cfiadw; most of my favorite dark kpop songs in one place (so much taemin hhhh)... The first of these songs is "The 7th Sense" by NCT U, which I think captures the vibes of this first chapter, especially this first scene, so well.  Dark, sultry, perhaps a bit understated.  The action hasn't started yet and you know something bad is going to happen eventually... but you're drawn into this relationship right off the bat, this relationship that is Obviously not healthy...

The title of this chapter ["open the doors to hell"] comes from the VIXX song "Voodoo Doll".  An appropriate chapter title and an appropriate song for this AU...

As it starts out, our characters are varying ages.  Seungcheol and Jeonghan are twenty (aged up from Christine's seventeen ick), Mingyu is in his late twenties, Wonwoo is thirty-two I believe...  and the Jeonghan and Seungcheol I picture are so near and dear to my heart...

and then ofc stupid handsome Mingyu....

Like I said, this is the best AU I've ever done if only for these three reasons lmao.

Let's get started!

[“Jeonghan.”

The voice was hypnotic, drawing him from the depths of his deep sleep with two simple syllables.  Like instinct.

“Jeonghan.”

He opened his eyes and was greeted by darkness.  Everything else started coming into focus, then; the soft snores and deep breathing of the others asleep in the room; the slightly moldy, certainly dank smell that always permeated the dancers’ dormitory; the cold night air seeping through his thin blanket, even with Chan pressed to his side.  He needed to talk to Wonwoo or someone about that; autumn would be there before they knew it and the nights would be even colder and -

“Jeonghan.”

He knew that voice, oh he knew that voice so well.]

Let's not talk about the fact that Mingyu creeps on Jeonghan when he sleeps lmao.  Anyway... I'm surprised how much my writing and my knowledge of it has changed in a year and a half.  These revisions are Long overdue.

[He knew that voice, oh he knew that voice so well.  Coming to him in the middle of the night, when no one else was awake; when it was just them in the world, them and their little secret.  Jeonghan held his breath, pushing himself up onto his elbows, and waited.  He searched the room for anything out of the ordinary; shadowy figures watching over him.  But he saw nothing, nothing to convince him that what he was hearing was reality and not simply a dream.

Closing his eyes again, wishing to stay in this dream fantasy as long as he could, Jeonghan replied, “Yes, master?”]

Jeonghan... do us all a favor and go back to bed pls.

[Down he went, down into the depths of the opera house.]

"down once more to the dungeons of my black despair!" - oh wait that comes later.  much, much later.

[Down he went, down into the depths of the opera house.  They were hardly secret or forbidden but, as long as Jeonghan had been here, no one dared ever traverse them.  The legends of what they held - a brooding ghost they all called the Phantom - were no doubt enough to keep everyone away.  Which meant it was blissfully empty down here every time Jeonghan came with his angel of music.  Even the ghost that terrorized rehearsals and stole trinkets and sheet music was never anywhere to be found when it was just Jeonghan and the angel; perhaps the Phantom was scared of him.  Frightened away by the light this angel stood for.]

Same energy as "you've never seen me and Batman in the same room together"

[But with emptiness came darkness; Jeonghan could not see a thing.  It was not unnerving, however, not like it was at first, all those years ago.  He knew his angel was here somewhere, watching him, and he closed his eyes.]

Just a reminder that they've been doing this for like nine years......

[“What shall I sing tonight?” he asked of the shadows.

And the shadows replied, “The aria from the last several weeks, from Tristan and Isolde."]

Changed it from "Hannibal" which was the opera used in the musical.  I read that Leroux's sister was an opera singer, or something like that, and as such he had a deep understanding of opera and used different ones as symbolism in the original novel.  So, taking a page from that, I chose Wagner's Tristan und Isolde as the opening performance.  When it opened in 1865 it was touted as highly sexual and quite the incoherent mess, just like Phantom's Don Juan Triumphant, whereas others immediately fell in love with it and the music and its story.  I thought its sensuality fitting, as this is the opera performance that gives us Jeonghan's debut, and knowing what I know of the opera, Jeonghan would fit a masculine/male version of Isolde so well.

Her character is very similar to Jeonghan's as well as that of Christine's in the musical/novel.  Considered to be "redeeming" for Tristan's doomed romantic figure, that stuck out to me, as Christine was expected to redeem the Phantom in the end of the musical.  What a demanding, exhausting role for a woman to be forced into.  Which is also something I try to touch on later on in the fic; it's not up to Jeonghan to redeem the Phantom, that's his own choice, his own actions.  All of this to say, Tristan und Isolde being used here is, of course, symbolic.

[The longer he spoke - the longer his tutor let him speak - the weaker his voice became until it was all but a whisper, lost in the ghostly echoes around them.  The angel never liked being second-guessed, never liked Jeonghan arguing with him (if such a simple query could be considered arguing, but in Jeonghan’s experience it often was).  Jeonghan took another deep breath as he waited for the wrath that would surely come.

“How many times have I told you,” the voice started slowly, softly - too soft and it sent pangs of fear straight to Jeonghan’s heart, “to never question me, Jeonghan?”]

Hey Jeonghan uh just so you know........... this isn't healthy bro........ okay but for fans of the musical I hope my interpretations are coming across; it's been kinda difficult reworking the lyrics into prose.

["Continue, Jeonghan.  Sing for me."]

Of course I can't help throwing in obvious references like this one heh.

["I wish I could sing this instead of Seungkwan," he whispered, echoing his thoughts, in a moment of weakness.  He could picture the audience before him and their adoring eyes.  God, he wanted it.  "He's been the lead in everything for years.  When will I get my chance?"

He regretted the words the moment they left his mouth and he immediately clammed up, as if he'd been scolded.  Seungkwan had worked hard to get where he was, and to be lead tenor for as long as he had when he was only a few years older than Jeonghan... well, he deserved the parts bestowed upon him.  And he performed this one so beautifully.  As he always did.]

I really like this part.  I think it shows a lot of Jeonghan's character and his relationship with Mingyu in this fic; at his heart, he's incredibly kind and friendly and warm but... he wants more, he always has.  He went from being a wealthy only child to a destitute orphan by the time he was ten years old, and he learned to stop wanting.  But now he has Mingyu, who believes in him, who wants to "help" him - who teaches him how to want again, in more ways than one.  It's, perhaps, too much, and maybe not the way Jeonghan wants it to be, though.

[Thoughts raced through Jeonghan's mind faster than he could catch them, but he didn't dare open his eyes.  Though, decidedly, not a single one of them was about Boo Seungkwan.  Why would they be, when his angel was close enough to touch?  Jeonghan could sense it, as if he were attuned to everything he was, every celestial piece of him.  "Angel," he whispered, "if I open my eyes, will you be here?"]

Not to toot my own horn, as I always do, but I really like this part, especially the addition.  I think it's really important to remember that Jeonghan has feelings for the angel he believes Mingyu to be, and once Mingyu reveals himself to be something different, something much different... well, everything kinda falls apart after that.  Of course, Seungcheol proves to be far more angelic than Mingyu but that's symbolic comparison for another entry.......

[A shudder ripped through Jeonghan's body when he felt hot, strong hands on his hips, burning through the thick material of his coat.  Any thoughts in his head stuttered and ceased, dissolved in the warmth suddenly surrounding him.  “Angel,” he whispered, trying to make sense of the sensations pulsing through his body.  Surely a heavenly being such as the one standing behind him, holding him tightly, should not be making him feel this way, like he couldn’t breathe, but he’d known for years that this was no ordinary angel.  The sadness that had clung to his voice when they met so long ago, in the chapel in the basement of the opera house, seemed out of place, even to Jeonghan's ten year old mind.  Of course, he didn't know much about angels or Heaven back then... just that the one that called to him sounded just as alone as Jeonghan had been.

"Sometimes heaven is not kind to those who are different,” he'd said, nothing more than a disembodied voice in the shadows of the stone chapel.  In that moment, Jeonghan knew he was different than the angels he'd read about in church.

And part of Jeonghan liked that about him, a part of himself he did not like indulging.

A part of him only his angel brought out.

“Jeonghan?”

A third voice.  It was further away, higher-pitched, and just as familiar.  Chan.]

lmao I forgot about Chan cockblocking thank you Lee Chan, doing god's work.

[A few moments later in the darkness of the dorm, Chan snuggling against his side, Jeonghan couldn’t find sleep.  His thoughts were haunted too much that he couldn't grasp any of it; it all slipped through his fingers like dust.  So he settled for staring up at the ceiling and listening to the snores around him.]

I really do love this first scene; poor sweet naïve Jeonghan... it's okay bby Seungcheol will be there soon and then you'll feel better I promise.

I must take a break now but honestly part two will probably come later! I'm feeling like I'm on a roll heh

cfiadw [ch. 1] [2/2]

 "catching fire in a devil's whisper" revision commentary
chapter one, part two

currently listening to: "overture" - andrew lloyd webber
fic word count: 110,276

technically the overture would be playing during this scene if this was the musical lmao and anyway i just really fucking love the organ in it omfg and the violins hhhh

For part two of chapter one, oof let's just dive right in!  We left off on Chan accidentally cockblocking Jeonghan during his secret early morning meeting with his "angel", with the promise of a full day ahead of our boys...

[The spring air nipped at Soonyoung’s face as he stepped from the carriage, the only part of him that was cold because the rest of him was bundled up in his warmest clothing.]

Ahh Soonyoung.  I tried my best to keep to his irl personality as much as I could, but he did indeed get cast as the "grumpy" manager in this so...

[It stood tall and proud in the morning light, a marvelous beauty, really; the sun glinted off the bronze and gold statues that adorned the exterior and posed monumentally above the two men.]

If I remember correctly, I don't think I give the opera house a particular name in this fic; in the novel and in the movie, I believe, it's the Palais Garnier.  Leroux simply used the name and location of the opera house he knew best, the one he heard was haunted with ghosts and accidents.  Since in my fic the opera house is being torn down in the "present" day, I chose not to have it be the Palais Garnier, though of course it is based off of it.  I mean, look how beautiful it is!

hhhh how I would Love to visit Paris and the Palais Garnier but alas........ no moneys :(  anyway that's not the point back to the ficccc

[A new voice, a deeper one, replied and Soonyoung turned to see a tall, thin man in a black coat make his way over to them.  The loose threads on his ragged sleeves and the way he carried himself sort of jolted Soonyoung out of the majesty around them.  As did the man's smile; it didn’t reach his eyes, and seemed to haunt his angular face.]

Wonwoo........... WONWOO.  My favorite character in this entire fic.  The last time I wrote him he [redacted] and so to come back here, to be reminded of how sad and tormented he was at the start, how he'd been like that for years and years... ow :(((

I mean just look at him.... with that curly hair and his glasses and just thinking about how sad and haunted he is, everything he goes through, everything he does... :(((

[He looked to the stage and saw a portion of the company gathered around a costumed man who looked, to Soonyoung's untrained eyes, like he might pass out if he continued singing like that.  But it seemed to suit him; mouth open wide, he broke through Wonwoo's words with a strong voice, as if he were made for the stage that held him.  Most of the other faces Soonyoung saw mirrored what he imagined his own looked like: thinly veiled surprise.  But the man continued on, commanding the attention of everyone around him, even those who were supposed to be acting, too.]

You know, I was really worried posting this fic with this iteration of Seungkwan.  It felt too close to the "diva Boo" portrayals we, rightfully, shunned - which is one reason why I decided to develop his character past the one-dimensional Carlotta that Lloyd Webber wrote.  Since I've grown up, Carlotta has become one of my favorite characters and I always feel so fucking bad for her in the end [I'll never forgive Joel Schumacher for that scene of her holding Piangi, rip] - which is another reason why I decided to let Seungkwan become an actual real character in this fic.

[“You and the rest of Paris, it seems,” Wonwoo said.  “But we have a plethora of singers.  The young man in costume over there - “ he motioned to a slender man laying on the stage before Seungkwan, watching him with amused eyes; one of the others who, Soonyoung assumed, was supposed to be acting - “is Hong Jisoo, and he generally plays opposite Seungkwan.  Gives him a run for his money if you ask me.”

“He’s handsome,” Seokmin said quietly, as if he did not want to be heard, and Soonyoung merely snorted to himself because of course.]

SEOKSOO.  Wow you can tell I wrote this when I was still a baby carat (I believe this was either January or February 2020, which means I'd only been a carat for about two or three months) but hey, I do still love Seoksoo.  I just don't think they go very far in this fic heh

(found a tense switch and i wanna DIE how long has that been there)

[The three of them made their way towards the stage, and Seungkwan’s singing grew even louder.  His strong, stable voice carried through the theater as he hit notes Soonyoung didn’t think existed.  Standing still as he crooned, Jisoo leaning against his legs with closed eyes as if in death...  Soonyoung didn't understand a word he sang but he felt them.  Bolstered by the emotions playing out across Seungkwan's face, practically co-stars themselves, he was transfixed.  Behind Seungkwan's beautiful voice the orchestra sounded, seemingly following every intonation Seungkwan made with their own sorrowful trilling.  It was, apparently, just what Soonyoung needed to lift his spirits and suddenly he truly could not wait for tonight.  No wonder this was touted as the best opera house in the country, and perhaps even Europe.

It left, for the briefest of moments, an uneasy feeling in the back of Soonyoung's head, tugging at his mind like an insistent child until he acknowledged it.

With performers this incredible, why was the previous owner so desperate to sell and run away?]

Most of this scene had to be rewritten to match the ending of Tristan und Isolde but I liked this passage the most!  Also thank god for Youtube; I found a recording from a 1983 performance and holy shit.... I've yet to watch the entire thing because it's literally 4 hours long but what I've seen is so goddamn beautiful.  The score, the libretto, the story... hhhhh

[“These are our new owners, Lee Seokmin and Kwon Soonyoung.  They made their fortune down in Marseille in the junk business - “

“Scrap metal,” Soonyoung bit out.  He definitely was not a fan of this Wonwoo thus far.]

Can you tell what my favorite part of the movie is heh

[“Can we get back to rehearsal?” came a voice from behind them.  "Need I remind you that this is a four hour production and we quite literally had two minutes left?"

Soonyoung turned and frowned at the scowling conductor.  He was at least half a foot shorter than Soonyoung, but his voice was strong.  It commanded attention, as all eyes turned to him, and Soonyoung fought back a smile at the sight of this angry little man.  “You are?”]

omg Soonhoon.... goddamn it I love Jihoon.... just wants to finish the damn 4 hour opera stfu wonwoo

[A faraway door slammed open, followed by the sound of rapid footsteps and then heavy breathing - and a man appeared at one of the entrances to the theater.  He ran fingers through curly raven hair hanging in his eyes as he rushed toward the stage, and through the dark, fancy clothes and the drawings Soonyoung had seen of him, he was able to quickly place the young man.

“Apologies, messieurs!” Vicomte Choi Seungcheol huffed out as he came to stand with everyone else.]

seungcheol :(((( this is also one of my favorite parts of the movie (honestly any part with Raoul is, I blame Patrick Wilson omfg) which isn't in the musical; I do love though how charming Raoul is in this scene and I wanted Seungcheol to capture that, too.  He is, after all, the purposeful epitome of youthfulness and good looks and light and all of that gay stuff.  Also just thinking about Jeonghan in this scene... seeing Seungcheol, knowing exactly who he is, debating between running and hiding or making himself known to the lost love of his goddamn life.  wow.

[Sweat gathered at his temples and he gave a bright smile that showed off his teeth and gums, and Soonyoung could hear the collective swooning that went up through the company.  But Soonyoung wasn't as impressed; charming young men with a lot of money tended to do more harm than good.  Soonyoung should know; he used to be one of those.  But, he had to admit, something about Choi Seungcheol was different.  Perhaps it was the way he looked around with wide, curious eyes, as if he'd never been this close to the stage before.  It made Soonyoung want to forgive him of his crimes, and he did, silently.  He was pouring his own (rather, his father's) money into the opera house too, after all.]

yeah I love Vicomte Seungcheol, it's a good look on him.

[Beside him the Vicomte waited patiently, albeit with a strange look on his face.  He stared at Jeonghan as if he knew him and was trying to place him; thick brows furrowed atop wide, curious eyes.]

ha ha yeah these two know each other omg I'm so subtle -

[“Monsieur, these things happen,” he said quietly, seeking Seungkwan out with a gentle gaze.  “Technical difficulties and all that.”

“‘These things happen’?” Seungkwan repeated, an air of incredulity to his tone.  “These things - “  He whirled on Wonwoo again, jabbing a righteous finger in his face that Wonwoo simply stared at, as if he'd seen it before.  “These things have been happening for years and no one has ever done anything to stop them!  Not you, not any of the managers, and it’s always happening to me!”

“Seungkwan please,” Wonwoo tried, but he was cut off.

“No!" He folded his arms across his chest.  "I won’t do it!  Until you stop ‘these things’ from happening, I won’t be singing!”  With a look at Soonyoung and Seokmin, a look that shoved Soonyoung’s heart down to the soles of his feet, Seungkwan cried, “Enjoy your opening night without your lead, managers!”

And with that he stormed offstage.]

that's right, Seungkwan, you tell them.  You're not crazy; Mingyu is kinda lowkey highkey trying to kill you for real so - at the very least, injure you.

[“Yoon Jeonghan could sing Seungkwan’s part,” Wonwoo responded casually, like it was a simple fact of life everyone should know.  Like Yoon Jeonghan was more than a chorus boy, a dancer.  Like Yoon Jeonghan had the same star power as Boo Seungkwan.

Yoon Jeonghan looked up with wide eyes full of stars and wonder, ears turning pink again.  All gazes were on him now, all hopes hinging on him and damn it, Soonyoung hoped the kid could at least carry a tune if he was their only option now.  “I - wh - um, I-I could try?”]

Jeonghan babie.

[And perhaps it was his imagination - no it was definitely his imagination - but Soonyoung swore he felt someone standing behind him.  But when he turned no one was there.]

Cut to Mingyu dropping to the floor out of sight.  Just kidding, he's up in the rafters wishing he could go down and hug Jeonghan too, along with everyone else......

Hhh okay and with that!! Chapter one is done!!!

I remember writing this one for the first time, how excited I was to start this so passionate of passion projects.  And look how far it's come since January 2020; over 100,000 more words, almost completely finished, 6.5k hits on Ao3, and the beginnings of a novel version in the works... yeah, it's safe to say this is my favorite fic of mine.  Ever.  I'm proud of every inch of it, truth be told, and am so thrilled to continue revising it.  I hope you're all enjoying reading about it!

Chapter two coming soon!